Women I could easily connect with or who effortlessly ‘got me’ and my complicated childless, ‘non-mom’ experience once felt elusive.
That’s because during my 30s and well into my early 40s I learned some hard truths. You could say I was akin to an older Janis Ian. Modifying a few of her classic lyrics a bit, I learned…
And those of us with tearful facesLacking in the social gracesDesperately remained at homeInventing non-moms on the phone
To those of us who knew the painOf much wanted children who never cameAnd those whose names were never calledWhen choosing sides for Baby & Me at the mall
It was long ago and far awayThe world was younger than todayWhen dreams were all they gave for freeTo childless women like me
Conscious Childless Elder Women Sharing Stories
That was until the blogosphere introduced me to a whole new world of truth telling. Today, as we approach 2023 I’ve had the remarkable good fortune to meet some of you in person, many on blogs and others via book clubs. Together, we’ve helped heal and educate. We’ve created community, raised awareness, and nurtured many, including our tribe.
More recently, thanks to the pioneering work of Jody Day, we’re also meeting via Zoom to capture and advance the realities of growing older sans children.
The latest topic of the Fireside Wisdom with Childless Elderwomen is Renewal. In a safe space on the winter solstice, we women shared stories, resources, insights, and hard-won wisdom. We covered a lot of important issues so rather than attempt to summarize, I encourage you to tune in and listen. I’ll extract some of the my favorite compelling thoughts in an upcoming post. Meanwhile, you can sign up to Jody’s mailing list for future sessions here
IVF Survivors: One of Slate’s Best Podcasts of 2022
Last week, amid what has felt like an endless series of COVID reactive respiratory infections (currently sinusitis and more asthma), some good news. Slate editors chose their favorite podcast episodes based on what they described as “engrossing interviews” and “untold stories.” Honored to learn the podcast where I shared what it was like to be an ‘IVF Survivor’ made the list. Can you believe it? The concept of an IVF Survivor is now in the lexicon — thanks to our coming forward with our stories.
What is so interesting to me is that even though you and I resolved infertility in different ways, we both ended up speaking out about market forces and predatory practices, you in the fertility industry and me in the adoption industry. Good job for shining light and paving the way for women (and men) who come after you and will benefit from your activism in this area. Congrats on being part of Slate’s Best Of, and here’s to continual renewal for you and for wise elderwomen in general.
Wish the same for you, dear Lori! You were such a breath of fresh air and calm when we met in July 2008 (!!) Here’s one post that rekindled memories https://www.coming2terms.com/2008/07/20/survivor-blogher-edition/
Your wisdom, compassion and gentle encouragement to speak my truths remains a cherished turning point in my healing and ongoing renewal.
So many good things to check out, I have marked them all for reading/listening! Renewal, I think, is less becoming something new and more peeling off the layer that doesn’t serve anymore and revealing more of the authentic “you-ness” inside.
It was wonderful to “see” you last week — I hope it becomes more of a regular thing! Happy New Year to you, I hope your lungs recover fully from the evil COVID and aftereffects.