Living the Life Unexpected
Book Musings

Living the Life Unexpected Takes on New Meaning

Living the life unexpected has become all too startlingly familiar, hasn’t it? Who among us has not felt jolted by the sudden onset of this out-of-nowhere, insidious coronavirus threat to what had been our mostly well-ordered lives and sense of agency? But, from my personally Cloroxed plane seat amid the current pandemic yesterday a spectacular […]

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infertility chasm
Different Than I Expected

On the Other Side of the Infertility Chasm

Hellllloooooo! Yes. Still here happily on the other side of the infertility chasm. Won’t bore you with details, but the past several weeks have been busier than usual.  A bit like drinking from a fire hydrant. Absorbing a great deal in all spheres of life.  While I may be very behind on social media and […]

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Identity after Infertility and Failed IVF

Identity — and the loss of it — loomed large 10 years ago as I sat staring at my computer. I didn’t know who I was any more. Scared. Untethered. Unsure of what awaited me. I stared at a blinking cursor. Heart broken. Filled with longing for what might have been. I nursed an overwhelming […]

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Book Musings

Two Wiser Women On Society and Motherhood

  Welcome to all on the virtual book tour for Life Without Baby: Surviving and Thriving When Motherhood Doesn’t Happen.  (Don’t have your copy yet? You can get one here. Don’t worry, we’ll wait…) ~~ Right. Let’s get to it, shall we? Author Lisa Manterfield has done a tremendous service for those grappling with this question: “What if I never get to […]

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Silent Sorority
Guest Post

Male Call: The Head Cannot Heal the Heart

Editor’s Note: When it comes to matters of the heart, there’s nothing quite so comforting and validating as discovering you’re not alone in teasing out complicated emotions. Whether in the blogosphere or in society as a whole male voices are in the minority on the topic of disenfranchised grief. It’s rare to hear men give […]

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The change
Linking Around

The Change: For Reals

While my recent blog posts have been outward facing — examining the increasingly surreal fertility-obsessed world and the entrepreneurial fertility industry eager to cash in around it  — this post, girlfriends, is kicking it old school. Grab a cup of coffee or your favorite libation ’cause we’re going inside the girl tent. The numbers don’t […]

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Dear Abby Infertility
Tapestry of Voices

Dear Abby Strikes Out On Infertility, Childless Not By Choice Question

Dear Abby (aka Jeanne Phillips), Pamela Jeanne here.  Nice to meet you. So let me get right to the point. That 2nd letter you posted today, the one about the woman feeling a void in her life following an infertility diagnosis? Yeah, I’m afraid you struck out. You see the question posed by BROKEN RECORD […]

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First We Get Really Uncomfortable…

Life would be a whole lot more comfortable and easier to navigate if it unfolded neatly or predictably. Alas, that’s not the case for most of us. Mix in a contentious, complex topic (e.g. the inability to reproduce) and watch the discomfort rise. It’s understandable. Beyond the biological unpleasantness, there is upheaval to our sense […]

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Infertility survivor
What I Wish I'd Know Then

Hello Strangers: I’m an Infertility Survivor and I’m Not Ashamed to Say It

Here is Part III of the ‘Bitter Infertiles’ conversation — on the anniversary of the day the podcast took place. This where we own up to our experiences as ‘Infertility Survivors.’  Mo:   One of the things I want to ask you ladies … people always focus on the negative of, as Pamela said, it’s not […]

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Tapestry of Voices

Keeping it 100: Identity Crisis and Emotional Cratering in a Mommy Mad World

In Part II of the ‘Bitter Infertiles’ podcast transcript (Part I here or listen to the podcast here), we talk infertility trauma, the assault to identity and misplaced mommy glorification… Mo: One of the big issues we discussed last month with a therapist was the devastating effect that infertility can have on the emotional well-being. […]

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