Tribalism at its best provides a haven and kinship. Who doesn’t like to feel accepted and validated? Tribalism at its worst, however, fuels misunderstandings, culture wars, and, at the extreme, ugliness. Most of us have witnessed or encountered all of the above. My latest tribal experience stemmed from my participation in Slate‘s podcast, What I…
Tag: identity
Life After Infertility: One Decade, Many Thoughts
Life after infertility brings unique challenges and stormy seas … in time, however, we acquire a quiet assurance and insights particular to those seasoned by turmoil, as those of us who have confronted infertility, know well. Recently, an interview request from an Australian editor provided a chance to revisit 10+ years of experience and the wisdom…
Identity after Infertility and Failed IVF
Identity — and the loss of it — loomed large 10 years ago as I sat staring at my computer. I didn’t know who I was any more. Scared. Untethered. Unsure of what awaited me. I stared at a blinking cursor. Heart broken. Filled with longing for what might have been. I nursed an overwhelming…
You Don’t Have To Be A Mother To Be A Loving Woman
Five years ago we made history. On September 28, 2010 Silent Sorority earned an award in the media capital of North America — New York City. There I was amid an unusual mix of a few celebrities, Reprotech industry sales people, clinicians, health advocates and RESOLVE representatives. In my acceptance speech I managed to hush…
Emotions: First We Get Really Uncomfortable…
Life would be a whole lot more comfortable and easier to navigate if it unfolded neatly or predictably. Alas, that’s not the case for most of us. Mix in a contentious, complex topic (e.g. the inability to reproduce) and watch the discomfort rise. It’s understandable. Beyond the biological unpleasantness, there is upheaval to our sense…
No Wonder I Was Such a Head Case
A recent piece in The New York Times headlined It’s Not Always Depression gave me the chance to play amateur psychologist. Join me on the couch as we explore emotions and how they affect the way we view ourselves or feel on any given day. To make this even more real, take yourself back to…
Hello Strangers: I’m an Infertility Survivor and I’m Not Ashamed to Say It
Here is Part III of the ‘Bitter Infertiles’ conversation — on the anniversary of the day the podcast took place. This where we own up to our experiences as ‘Infertility Survivors.’ (In Part II of the ‘Bitter Infertiles’ podcast transcript (Part I here or listen to the podcast here), we talk infertility trauma, the assault…
Keeping it 100: Identity Crisis and Emotional Cratering in a Mommy Mad World
In Part II of the ‘Bitter Infertiles’ podcast transcript (Part I here or listen to the podcast here), we talk infertility trauma, the assault to identity and misplaced mommy glorification… Mo: One of the big issues we discussed last month with a therapist was the devastating effect that infertility can have on the emotional well-being….
Infertility Community’s Black Sheep: Women Who Don’t Achieve Motherhood
Some ‘no-holds barred’ conversations stick with you — like the one Loribeth and I engaged in on surviving infertility and the search for peace in a mommy mad world. (Listen to the podcast here). Not achieving motherhood is a taboo topic in the infertility community, which is why we were unlikely guests on the tongue-in-cheek named…
New Philosophy: Everything To Gain
How is it that the mind is so much more agile and able to turn over ideas and philosophies with such ease … in the pre-dawn? With rain falling softly against the window at 5am, and my iPad lighting up the room, I swiped my screen to find a Sunday Review piece called Abundance Without…