Skip to content

Silent Sorority

Infertility Survivors Finally Heard

Menu
  • My Story
    • Silent Sorority: Memoir
    • Coming2Terms Blog
  • About
  • Bylined Work
    • Times of London: The False Hope of ‘Fertility’ Benefits
    • NYT Op-Ed: The Big IVF Add-on Racket
    • STAT: Dark side of IVF
    • Do à la carte menus serve infertility patients?
    • New York Times Op-Ed: Selling the Fantasy of Fertility
    • WIRED: The Sobering Facts About Egg Freezing
    • FORTUNE: The Tough Truth About Egg Freezing
    • The Huffington Post
    • Medium ‘Human Parts’
    • Seleni Institute
    • New York Times Motherlode
    • Infertility’s Emotional Impact
  • In the News
    • MSNBC: Childless Not By Choice
    • STAT: IVF ‘add-ons’ rest on shaky science
    • IVF ‘Add-On’ Procedures Offer False Hope
    • Named ‘Top Health Blogger’ by Health Magazine
    • The Globe and Mail
    • The New York Times
    • MarketWatch – 10 Things Fertility Clinics Won’t Say
    • Women’s eNews
    • Radio: Living Childfree
    • Yahoo Shine Health Feature
    • The Broad Side
    • ABC TV Interview
    • Redbook
  • ReproTech Medicine Reporting
Menu
renewal

Setting Sights on Renewal

Posted on October 31, 2022November 1, 2022 by Pamela Tsigdinos

Now more than ever, I’d like to focus on renewal.

It feels overdue after three tumultuous years.  In what feels like another lifetime, November 2019, I happily dove into a glass half-full. I looked ahead, joyfully, to a new decade.  New academic and writing successes blossomed one after another. Travel plans fired my imagination. My optimism and energy knew no bounds.  Here in the U.S., many eagerly anticipated an election that would oust a coarse, contentious president and his ugly policies.

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to us, a vicious virus poised to emerge and explode.

Structural Changes

Seemingly overnight, plans large and small evaporated. As COVID spread, our worlds got smaller. Survival took on a new and more visceral clarity. The world’s economies, social dynamics, and priorities convulsed in unexpected ways turning many of our lives upside down and inside out.

Apart from the now well-documented destructive biological disruptor, we’ve faced other foes and dangers at home and abroad.  Around the world, we now mark time and memories with new descriptors: pre-pandemic; pre-January 6; pre-Brexit; pre-Ukrainian invasion; pre-Dobbs decision; pre-climate change disaster (choose your local flavor: wildfire, drought, flood, hurricane) …

Untold personal loss, strain and turmoil accompanied each new upheaval.

Did I mention I’m overdue for a renewal of optimism?

Liminal Space

Swept up in this three-year blender of structural changes we’ve been tossed, willy-nilly, into new and unfamiliar liminal spaces. Liminality, I’m reminded, is defined as the state of being in-between or something that is in a state of transition.  Don’t know about you, readers, but I thought I was pretty adept at managing new and unfamiliar liminal spaces. Turns out this latest wave of structural changes and the liminality they created did more than test me. They depleted me regularly.

I know this because, pre-all-of-the-above, things that once brought me energy, joy and sustenance … writing, yoga, engaging with big ideas and fellow bloggers, travel, seeking out new relationships and nurturing friendships … these all took more effort than I had within me on most days.  Many of my cherished activities and occupations languished. They didn’t get the attention they deserved. For that, I apologize for my remoteness and acknowledge my limitations.

See also  Stuck? Seems We've Been Here Before

In recent weeks, I’ve channeled my limited energy in a new way. I’ve been busy helping to elect compassionate, honest and competent leaders at the local, state and national level in a variety of grassroots ways. The outcome of elections across the U.S. November 8 will set a course for what comes next not only locally and nationally but internationally. To my U.S. readers, if you haven’t voted yet, please make the time to do so.

Buckle up, I keep telling myself. Anything can happen…

Renewal

This is my long way of saying: renewal of mind, body and soul remains a top priority. That’s why I’m reserving time December 21 to reflect on the theme of renewal and what it means with fellow Gateway Childless Elderwomen. Clearly, I’m not alone in my desire for renewal. Friend and fellow elderwoman, Jody Day, writes about what inspired this latest fireside chat.  She dives deeper here. I hope you can join us; you may register here.

childless elderwomen

Also in the renewal of ideas category, please check in with the New Legacy Institute blog. Christine Erickson and her advisory board have some new efforts in the works. More to come on this in the coming weeks and months.

Social Sign Offs?

Finally, I’m sure I’m not alone in wondering whether it’s past time to delete some of my social media accounts. Ugh. The latest news about Twitter?  Ugh. Similar frustration about Facebook and Instagram. While I value the connections and ease of communicating across the world that each platform provides, I dislike the billionaire bros who own the companies. Not sure who still uses blog readers? I may need to fire up my newsletter to share posts in the future instead. Welcome your thoughts.

See also  Heart to Heart

Related Posts:

  • Oh, The Places We'll Go!
    Oh, The Places We'll Go!
  • Women Who Elevate the Childless Conversation
    Women Who Elevate the Childless Conversation
  • A Quiet Mind, Calm Spirit In the Wake of Unexplained Infertility
    A Quiet Mind, Calm Spirit In the Wake of Unexplained…
  • Pandemic Elicits Curious Time Space Musings
    Pandemic Elicits Curious Time Space Musings
  • You're the Star of Your Own Life
    You're the Star of Your Own Life
  • 'Non-moms' Often Forced to Contemplate and Carve out Their Own Unique Space and Meaning
    'Non-moms' Often Forced to Contemplate and Carve out Their…

7 thoughts on “Setting Sights on Renewal”

  1. Kathleen Guthrie Woods says:
    November 1, 2022 at 12:17 pm

    It’s like you’re living inside my brain, my heart. I get it! Looking forward to some concentrated, collective RENEWAL on Dec. 21. xoxo

    Reply
    1. Pamela Tsigdinos says:
      November 5, 2022 at 8:53 am

      Always love a good mind/heart meld! And we’ll each get some added renewal this week in the form of some much-needed precipitation — in the Bay area as well as the Sierra Nevada Mountains. Sweeter air and saturated soil will go a long way to freshening our environment. Yeah!

      Reply
  2. Mali says:
    November 2, 2022 at 6:27 pm

    I for one love blogs! I dip in and out of Insta, have never really used Twitter, use Fbk to keep in touch with family and friends overseas and try to avoid the frustrating political stuff there, and feel the same way as you do about the billionaire bros (ugh).

    I think just getting through the days and remaining sane has been an achievement the last few years, so I want to congratulate you on that. It has been tough. I feel as if I’m catching up with you guys, as the first 18 months or so of the pandemic left me relatively unscathed, living here in – at the time – covid-free NZ. But the last year has been harder, and with the onslaught of ghastliness here and all over the world, I can relate more to the energy-depleting nature of the world in 2022. I am really glad you’ve been able to do some things that have inspired you, and have helped you feel you’re doing good in this world. Of course, I think you and your writings are always doing good in this world, even if you don’t get the daily feedback!

    Yay to the fireside wisdom of the women who are my tribe. Would be nice to see some a kiwi (wink wink) or so involved there too.

    Reply
    1. Pamela Tsigdinos says:
      November 5, 2022 at 8:49 am

      You are a role model blogger, Mali. So admire your steadiness and tenacity in the blogosphere. As for the achievement of sanity amid today’s ’24/7 disaster of the moment’ world, well, that is worthy of a virtual hug and hooray! Yeah, for groundedness! You have no idea how many times my mind has to the thought: one of these days Mali and I will meet in person and have a laugh or two while admiring the beauty of New Zealand. Now there’s something lovely to look forward to! Meanwhile, YES, I’ll be sure to nudge Jody to include another spot in a future fireside chat. xoxo

      Reply
  3. Phoenix says:
    November 3, 2022 at 9:33 am

    In the spirit of renewal, I can attest that leaving social media is totally fine. I didn’t last long on IG, maybe a year or two a long time ago. I noticed it made me feel bad so I quit. I left FB when I left my marriage, and I haven’t missed it once in the last 4 years. Twitter was my holdout. I loved Twitter so much. I got good news there, read funny tweets, and belonged to several groups with specific interests. However, I deleted my account in April. The good news is I have sewed A LOT more since then and have read several books too. I don’t miss social media at all.

    Reply
    1. Pamela Tsigdinos says:
      November 5, 2022 at 8:37 am

      Ah! Good to know I’m not alone in my longing to move away from superficial social media obligations. I have always felt much more comfortable with longer form communication and prefer the pre-social media days. Give me a good pen-pal relationship or thought-provoking blog post and interrelated conversations. They provide a different kind of sustenance and deeper connection.

      Reply
  4. loribeth says:
    November 10, 2022 at 5:35 pm

    It’s been a crazy three years, hasn’t it? Looking forward to seeing you & the others on Dec. 21st and hearing what you have to say. (I’ll be at my parents’ house, getting ready for Christmas, but I have a calendar alert set!)

    I still use a blog reader (Bloglovin — and you are in there, as well as in the blogroll list on my own blog) — but if you’ve read my blog recently, you’ll know it’s been an ongoing source of frustration for me…! (Google Reader, I sure miss you…!) I know Mali uses and recommends Feedly, but it only lets me follow 100 blogs for free, and I have WAY more than that on my list!! (albeit not all of them very active these days…)

    As for social media, I’ve never used it to promote my blog, so I can’t help you there. It’s my one way of keeping in touch with far-flung friends & relatives (FB & IG, anyway — Twitter, not so much) — so I don’t see myself cancelling my accounts anytime soon. I will admit, though — I used to kind of panic if I hadn’t made it through my feed — huge FOMO! Since my surgeries this summer, though, I’ve found it impossible to keep up — and I’ve kind of stopped trying. It’s actually been kind of freeing. :) I would miss it if it wasn’t there, but I don’t feel the need to keep on top of every little thing the way I used to. Maybe that’s one of the good things about getting older…?? ;)

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

My Books

Popular Posts

  • Strong At The Broken Places
  • IVF Rollercoaster: BBC Radio Show Callers Describe ‘Grueling, Painful, Isolating, Roll of Dice’
  • Dear Abby Strikes Out On Infertility, Childless Not By Choice Question
  • The Invisibleness of Infertility: To Pass or Not to Pass?
  • Not Having Children After Infertility ‘An Assault to Identity’
  • Infertility Community: A Microcosm of Society Misunderstandings and All
  • Infertility Community’s Black Sheep: Women Who Don’t Achieve Motherhood
  • Ending Fertility Treatment Equated with Madness?
  • Identity after Infertility and Failed IVF
  • Defining Abuse in Assisted Reproductive Technology

Subscribe to New Blog Posts

 Subscribe in a reader

Archives

Tags

Avalanche bioethics change Childless childlessness conflict culture egg freezing emotions expectations fertility industry fertility treatment friendships grief growth guest post healing health heroines identity infertility IVF Jessica Hepburn Jody Day journey lessons loss media motherhood myths narrative non-moms psychology reinvention relationships research RESOLVE silent sorority society stigma survival trauma travel truths what ifs

Categories

  • An Act of Kindness
  • Another Perspective
  • Bioethics
  • Book Musings
  • Changing Perceptions
  • Choices
  • Different Than I Expected
  • Documentary
  • Fortitude
  • Guest Post
  • Linking Around
  • Movies
  • News Reports and Studies
  • Pandemic
  • Pop Culture
  • Psychology
  • Relationships
  • Remembrance
  • Spontaneity
  • Strength Personified
  • Tapestry of Voices
  • The Cycle Relay Forum
  • Uncategorized
  • What I Wish I'd Know Then

Recent Comments

  • Permission to Feel Emotions Deeply - Silent Sorority on Childless Not by Choice: A Conversation with Civilla Morgan
  • In Limbo Once Again: Long COVID This Time - Silent Sorority on Parallel Universe Reveals Hard Truths
  • In Limbo Once Again: Long COVID This Time - Silent Sorority on A Sad Daughter Confronts the End of the Long Goodbye
  • In Limbo Once Again: Long COVID This Time - Silent Sorority on Pandemic Elicits Curious Time Space Musings
  • In Limbo Once Again: Long COVID This Time - Silent Sorority on Forever Changed … Again

Blogroll

  • A Blank New Page
  • Bent Not Broken
  • Childless By Marriage
  • Conscious Childless Elderwomen
  • Des meandres aux etoiles (French)
  • Different Shores
  • Elaine OK (German)
  • Ever Upward
  • Femme Sans Enfant (French)
  • Finding A Different Path
  • Gateway Women
  • Infertile Phoenix
  • Infertility Honesty
  • It's Inconceivable
  • Jessica Hepburn's Blog
  • Just Being
  • Lavender Luz
  • Lesley Pyne
  • Life Without Baby blog
  • MSNBC – Life After IVF
  • No Kidding in NZ
  • Other side of the threshold (Swedish)
  • ReproTechTruths
  • Sitrrup Queen's Blogroll
  • SlidingDoors
  • Slow Swimmers & Fried Eggs
  • The Dove Cote
  • The Empty Cradle (Brisbane)
  • The Infertility Voice
  • The Next 15,000 Days
  • The NotMom
  • The Road Less Travelled
  • Uber Barrens Club
  • Walk in Our Shoes
© 2023 Silent Sorority | Powered by Superbs Personal Blog theme