Permission is a tricky thing. We frequently readily provide it to others but deny it to ourselves. That’s often because allowing ourselves freely to engage in activities such as sitting with our emotions can seem self-indulgent. But, in reality, it can be self-affirming. Reader Writes About Permission Denied It’s always gratifying to hear from new…
Category: Book Musings
‘The Mother of All Dilemmas’ Explores Cultural Conditioning and ‘Choices’
Dilemmas, by their very definition, don’t offer easy or tidy resolutions. Now, toss in some deeply ingrained stereotypes, social and economic pressures, and reproductive siren songs and reckonings. Top it off with a healthy amount of identity sorting. What have you got? A hardy dilemma salad of sorts with some intense and, at times, biting…
Tokenism Takes a New Form
Tokenism is an awkward thing to experience. I never fully understood how prevalent it is for childless women, but the penny dropped a few weeks ago. So, it started when a Random House marketing manager sent a ham-handed email. She asked if I’d like to read and share The Trying Game as part of October’s…
Living the Life Unexpected Takes on New Meaning
Living the life unexpected has become all too startlingly familiar, hasn’t it? Who among us has not felt jolted by the sudden onset of this out-of-nowhere, insidious coronavirus threat to what had been our mostly well-ordered lives and sense of agency? But, from my personally Cloroxed plane seat amid the current pandemic yesterday a spectacular…
Life After Infertility: One Decade, Many Thoughts
Life after infertility brings unique challenges and stormy seas … in time, however, we acquire a quiet assurance and insights particular to those seasoned by turmoil, as those of us who have confronted infertility, know well. Recently, an interview request from an Australian editor provided a chance to revisit 10+ years of experience and the wisdom…
Friend or Coworker Clueless About Infertility?
A friend or coworker can exacerbate infertility pain out of sheer ignorance. A careless comment or mass email can magnify suffering in ways large and small. Some years back, I participated on an infertility chat board. The clueless topic came up. It led to a discussion about how Silent Sorority could be used as a…
Silent Sorority Marks 10-Year Anniversary
Silent Sorority marks its 10-year anniversary this month. It became the first memoir to tackle failed IVF and explore infertility’s disenfranchised grief. In honor of this milestone, we’ll look back at the book’s impact and the conversations it stimulated. Let’s start with The Ladies in Waiting Book Club. The initial discussion is preserved on The…
The Latest With Me: Book Musings and More
A book is not a light undertaking. My first, Silent Sorority, took nearly five years to come together. Silent Sorority will mark its 10-year anniversary in a few short weeks. It became available April 18, 2009. In honor of that milestone, I’ll post some of the heart-felt responses I’ve received from readers around the world…
21 Miles: Reconciling Grief, Love and Fear
21 Miles not only held my attention (no small feat in today’s distraction-addled environment), it fed my heart and nurtured my soul. 21 Miles recounts the story of Jessica Hepburn‘s valiant efforts to both swim the English Channel and answer whether “motherhood makes you happy” or whether “you can have a fulfilling life without children.”…
Finding Joy Beyond Childlessness
Childlessness and joy are rarely used in the same sentence. Lesley Pyne, however, has devoted the past few years digging into the reality of childlessness. Her quest? To understand how to process the losses, carve out a new path and rediscover joy. It’s all in her new book, Finding Joy Beyond Childlessness: Inspiring Stories to…